What is Learned Helplessness?

Learned helplessness occurs when a person has faced repeated adversity or negative experiences, and as a result, they begin to believe they are powerless to influence outcomes, even when opportunities for change are present. This belief can spread across different areas of life, including work, relationships, health, and personal goals.

The concept was first identified by psychologist Martin Seligman in the 1960s. In his studies, Seligman demonstrated that animals subjected to unavoidable negative experiences eventually stopped trying to escape or change their situation, even when escape became possible. This behaviour was later observed in humans as well, particularly in individuals who had faced prolonged stress, shitty life experiances, or failure.

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Common Signs of Learned Helplessness:

• Feeling overwhelmed or passive in the face of challenges

• Lack of motivation or unwillingness to try new solutions

• Feeling stuck or unable to change your circumstances

• A sense of resignation, believing that no effort will lead to improvement

• Difficulty making decisions or taking initiative

• Low self-esteem or confidence in your ability to influence outcomes

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This state can negatively impact every aspect of life, from career development to personal relationships and basic mental health. The good news is that with the right tools and mindset shifts, it is possible to overcome learned helplessness and regain control over your life.

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The Impact of Learned Helplessness

Learned helplessness can significantly affect both mental and emotional well-being. When people feel powerless for prolonged periods, they may experience:

• Depression and anxiety: Feelings of helplessness are strongly linked to depression. Individuals may feel that they cannot control their environment or change negative patterns, leading to a deep sense of hopelessness. Anxiety may also arise from the belief that challenges are insurmountable or outside of one's control.

• Diminished self-worth: Constant feelings of helplessness can erode self-esteem. When people believe they are unable to change their circumstances, they may begin to see themselves as failures or incapable of success.

• Damaged relationships: Learned helplessness can seep into personal relationships, causing individuals to withdraw, feel unsupported, or become overly dependent on others for decision-making or emotional validation.

• Limited growth: Learned helplessness stifles personal and professional development, as it discourages risk-taking, problem-solving, and trying new approaches to challenges.

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Breaking Free from Learned Helplessness: Steps to Take Your Power Back

Overcoming learned helplessness requires a shift in mindset, a willingness to challenge negative beliefs, and practical strategies to regain control over your life. Here are several steps you can take to reclaim your personal power and move forward:

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1. Recognise the Patterns

The first step in overcoming learned helplessness is acknowledging that it exists. It’s important to recognise when feelings of helplessness arise and identify specific situations where you feel stuck or powerless.

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How to Do This:

• Reflect on areas of your life where you feel defeated or like you have no control.

• Ask yourself if there have been times where you assumed failure or gave up before trying.

• Notice patterns of negative self-talk, such as "Why bother?" or "Nothing will change."

By recognising these patterns, you can begin to break the cycle of helplessness and take the first step toward reclaiming your power.

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2. Challenge Negative Beliefs

Learned helplessness is fuelled by negative and limiting beliefs that tell you that your efforts will always be in vain. To counter this, it’s important to challenge these beliefs by questioning their validity.

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How to Do This:

• Write down any limiting beliefs that contribute to your sense of helplessness. For example, "I always fail at this," or "No matter what I do, things don’t improve."

• Ask yourself whether these beliefs are objectively true or based on past experiences that don’t necessarily predict the future.

• Replace these limiting beliefs with more empowering ones. For instance, instead of "I always fail," try "I have succeeded in some areas before, and I can learn from my mistakes to succeed in this area too."

Challenging these beliefs helps you reframe your mindset and opens up the possibility for positive change.

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3. Focus on What You Can Control

One of the most effective ways to break free from learned helplessness is to identify the aspects of your life that are within your control. Even when circumstances feel overwhelming, there are usually small actions you can take to create change.

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How to Do This:

• Make a list of things in your current situation that you have control over, no matter how small. For example, while you might not control the outcome of a job application, you do control how many applications you submit or how much effort you put into improving your resume.

• Set small, achievable goals that allow you to take actionable steps toward regaining a sense of control. Success in small tasks can build momentum and confidence.

Shifting focus to what you can control helps you feel empowered and reduces feelings of helplessness.

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4. Practice Self-Compassion

It’s important to acknowledge that setbacks and failures are a natural part of life. Practicing self-compassion involves treating yourself with kindness and understanding, especially when things don’t go as planned.

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How to Do This:

• Replace self-criticism with more compassionate thoughts, such as "It’s okay that things didn’t work out this time. I can learn from this and try again."

• Acknowledge the challenges you’ve faced and give yourself credit for the efforts you’ve made, even if the results haven’t been ideal.

• Remember that everyone experiences failure, and it doesn’t define your worth or ability to succeed in the future.

Self-compassion helps you build resilience and encourages you to keep trying, even in the face of setbacks.

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5. Build Resilience Through Action

Taking action, even in small ways, can help you rebuild a sense of personal power. When you challenge yourself to take steps toward your goals, you’ll begin to see that you are capable of creating change.

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How to Do This:

• Start with manageable tasks or challenges that allow you to experience small successes. For example, if you feel helpless in your career, consider updating your resume, networking with colleagues, or taking a course to improve your skills.

• Celebrate your progress, no matter how small, and use these successes as motivation to continue moving forward.

• Surround yourself with supportive individuals who encourage you to take action and help you stay accountable to your goals.

Taking action helps you shift from a passive, helpless mindset to one of empowerment and control.

Reclaiming Your Power and Moving Forward

Learned helplessness can leave you feeling stuck, but it’s important to remember that you are not powerless. By recognising the patterns that hold you back, challenging negative beliefs, and taking small steps toward change, you can begin to take your power back and regain control over your life.

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The journey to empowerment takes time, but each step forward builds resilience, confidence, and the ability to face challenges with a renewed sense of strength. With the right mindset and strategies, you can overcome learned helplessness and move toward a more fulfilling and empowered life.

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Disclaimer: The information provided here is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional counselling or therapy. If you are struggling with feelings of helplessness or mental health challenges, it is recommended to seek support from a qualified and clinically registered counsellor.